They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
