Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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