He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize