You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Randomize
