cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
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