Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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