first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
