Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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