fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
no more duck duck goose at the bar
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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