He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Randomize
