Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
is that a dick in a sweater?
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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