he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Randomize
