Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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