I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Randomize
