so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
