READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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