it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
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im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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