the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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