So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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