Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
The power of my boobs compel you
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize