i can't believe i had my finger in that
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
