yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
