You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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