Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
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