so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
