How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
