Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
we're so committed to being not committed
Randomize
