is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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