Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
