i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
only you would photoshop your dick
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Boobs are out for the taking
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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