I just saw a hot homeless man
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
