Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
he wants to bone in the snuggie
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize