she was so not down for the gang bang
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
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