Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
