I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Randomize
