Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
