Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize