Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
