you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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