just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
