so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
