She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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