therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Of course I have a pirate flag
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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