there was a trapeze. enough said
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
