What a fucking waste of an outfit
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize