Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come back. Shots need mouths.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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