It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
