Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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