do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Randomize
