I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Just high enough for therapy.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
