Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
