We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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